Wednesday, August 27, 2014

gaymeofthrones:

me: mom im hungry

mom: eat a fruit

me:

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elijahkrantz:

I found out santa wasnt real because I got a spy kit that christmas so i fingerprinted my mom and matched it to the fingerprints i dusted on the milk mug i left out… Im on that next level shit

Tuesday, August 26, 2014

allteensrelate:

Ariana GRANDE// BIG Sean????

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2damnfeisty:

materiajunkie:

"Curing AIDS? Shit, that’s like Cadillac making a car that lasts for 50 years. And you know they can do it, but they ain’t going to do nothing that fucking dumb. Shit, they got metal on the Space Shuttle that can go around the Moon and withstand  temperatures of up to 20,000 degrees, you mean to tell me you don’t think they can make an El Dorado with a fuckin’ bumper that don’t fall off?"

- Chris Rock (“Bigger and Blacker”, 1999)

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#staywoke

guy:

i don’t like your clothes take them off

(Source: guy)

deathsofme:

NO CHILL

deathsofme:

NO CHILL

dekutree:

girls: spank me i’ve been naughty

me: its okay we all make mistakes 

Monday, August 25, 2014
BRUH WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS AND WHY DO I KEEP SAYING IT?? MY MOM TOLD ME TO CLEAN MY ROOM TODAY AND I LOOKED HER STRAIGHT IN THE EYE AND SAID “BRUH” (via isnowfairy)
Sunday, August 24, 2014

thrashturbate:

cynical-bee:

thrashturbate:

I’ll bet you’d look adorable grasping at the sheets on my bed

no matter how many times u compliment me im not making ur bed

this has to be one of the best responses I’ve gotten to this text post